The Script Has Already Been Written

December 30 2021

Have you ever looked back on a part of your life and been in absolute disbelief it really happened? You shake your head and furrow your brow because none of it made sense.

None of it made sense……then.

But months or even years later…..it does make sense. The reasons becomes clear, and although that period of time may have caused you pain or heartache…..it brought with it a gift you couldn't have appreciated without having gone through the unforeseen challenge first.

It's a humbling realization that we aren't ‘driving the boat’.

A power far greater than anything you can humanly possess is calling the shots in your life. We think we are in charge of our own lives because we have the ability to chose a certain event to attend, or a career to pursue, or a person to marry. Those decisions are just a mere fraction of the big picture.

The real journey……the destiny…….the epiphanies…they were always going to happen regardless of the smaller decisions you made. Yet somehow all those small decisions propelled you to where you needed to be. If you look closely at where you ended up…it probably wasn't part of the original plan, it probably wasn't even on a bucket list. But here you are.

The beauty of life’s process is when you become keenly aware of the twists and turns that are inevitable…you slowly learn to anticipate them and each time you become more proficient and less blindsided.

What I have learned from the ridiculous amount of pain and loss I have navigated through in my life…..is…..every single tear, every single heartbreak, and every single curse word….prepared me for the journey I was meant to be on.

I married the love of my life and created a family that unbeknownst to me would completely disintegrate in a mere 10 years time. I kept picking up the broken pieces, trying to have some semblance of what I had lost…..but it was never meant to be put back together.

People grow and go their separate ways because thats the journey they are on. And just because it doesn't include you, doesn't mean it isn't right for you too. Those people, whether friends, family or simple acquaintances, aren't meant to be on your journey. No matter how much you think they should be.

What I can say for certain is this. The surprises and the gifts that replace the losses are healing.

If you can reach a level of trust in the universe, and allow yourself to let go of what you think is supposed to be…….what actually IS supposed to be ….happens.

I had never been to Idaho …ever. I live here now and cant imagine being happy anywhere else. That didn't happen because I planned it. It happened because I am supposed to be here for the next chapter. When people would ask me ‘What made you chose Idaho’. I didn't have an answer because I didn't know. It was on a list of states that are affordable to retire in, crime rate is minimal, and it had wide open spaces. I googled houses for sale…found one….didn't get it….but shortly after I came across the house I was supposed to have. I knew it the minute I saw it. It was in much need of repair…but so was I. So I picked up what was left of my life, and set about repairing this broken home because it was a great way to stay busy and not think of the life I left behind. As the home was restored….a healing returned to my heart as well. I had something to show for my perseverance. And it was nice not having people around who criticized my beliefs, and the way I did things. I became reacquainted with who I really am, and realized how much of ‘me’ had been lost while I co existed alongside other peoples journeys.

With that…also came less tolerance for the people who had held me down and minimized my worth over the years.

I am a much more complete person now, then I was when I initially moved to Idaho. Apparently I needed to be completely extracted from the life I once had, in order to be better prepared for the next chapter that has been written.

I sure hope the next chapter has moose...:)

As you ring in the new year….and make the silly lists of all the resolutions you plan on adhering to…just make one.

Make a resolution to stay true to yourself. Regardless of the company you are in….or the challenges that you face.

Just be true to you. Take a deep breath…..and stay ‘present’.

Because the script is already written.

Angels Are Everywhere.

But thats just my opinion. :)